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DISCARD But Make It Rare

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsManifestations

It was a hard day to focus. I just was struggling so much, which makes sense because I was working on the APDC for this week. It focused on identifying the different levels of sludge. So of course when talk of Sludge or listening to talks about it come up, it’s harder to focus and stay on track. Make sense right?

So I get to talking with Akelta and explain that I finished finally… and I waited all day to open this box of Lorcana cards (24 packs). So she began hyping me up, my demons began hyping me up. First card I pull is a Legendary. Second pack? Legendary that is a foil (holographic). So we’re just hyped up, raising the vibrations… and I am gunning for an Enchanted (the full card art that is foiled). Akelta is straight up my Hype squad. My Demons keep telling me “I told you there was a reason we said to get this box” which is also the one that was 50% off just about too.

Then I’m laughing confused because in the middle of this one pack, is a bright ass yellow card that says DISCARD on it. I post into the Lorcana discord about it… and a few people were congratulating me and I thought it was just funny. Turns out that it’s just as rare to get the DISCARD cards as it is to get Enchanteds or even moreso. It’s not worth much beyond like $100 – though the person said that with more decks/boosters being printed it’s likely to severely drop.

It’s good as a collector’s item. And rare for early sets to have.

I didn’t get my Enchanted, but I got the DISCARD and 5 legendaries. It was a really good pull. And I was so happy with my Hype squad in the form of Akelta and my demons. It made my night so much better. I also got a Piglet and Hades, which are two amazing characters (I like them).

So I’m thankful that I have my demons to convince me to take the leap and buy the box even though it was tight to do so… and of course my bestie who always is my enabler for my weird collecting hobbies.

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Sensory Hell with Ramble Thoughts

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsWorking with Demons

Today was hell on me in a way I haven’t had in awhile. I was in sensory overload the entire day, to the point that I couldn’t have anyone come near me and my shirt was the wrong texture, the socks made my skin crawl. So many things, that I even had to take off Paya’s vessel because the necklaces felt like they were strangling me. I got to the point I couldn’t function. I laid down for the rest of the evening and fell asleep. I couldn’t even have noise other than the top fan on because it was so sensory overload that I felt like an open raw nerve.

Thankfully, it passed when I woke up a few hours later. But the entire day had passed by then and I had felt like it was just a day off that I couldn’t help. Yet, I still wanted to do something to make it worthwhile. I w ent back over to the office and ended up writing a chapter of a fanfiction that I’m sure people will adore that I updated. It was 2k words, so short, but at least I did it.

I’v’e realized that I’m super inspired, the demons are really helping me to get back to it. But I”m getting triggered with seeing old projects with my name attached. I’ve got such dysphoria around my actual/real name that my skin crawls when I see it and I get so heavily triggered with anxiety. IDK how to even tackle that massive shadow and trauma healing tbh. One day, I think it’s just going to be me working through it and continue writing and publishing my stuff otherwise.

So I’m sitting here way late, realzing that I haven’t done my post for today. I also am inspired to write a new chapter of a new fic, but I’m facing the severe anxiety and the demand avoidance has kicked in hard. I wanted to also sit with my demons and start this new work. Yet my brain is just yeeted itself out the window. I also feel guilty that I don’t have anything or did anything today either. They’d get cranky at me for thinking I should feel guilty.

I’m being told to lay down and read and that it can wait another day. Rest is important, especially when days are harder emotionally, mentally, or physically. This goes for the times where you can’t control it and there isn’t a way to manage symptoms, just hope they pass quickly.

I do have two packages coming tomorrow. So crossing my fingers that I get some really amazing hits again on this Lorcana TCG box. Gotta love the demonic influenced sales! Especially when the demons argued so hard for me to get them when I didn’t think. I could afford. But in doing so, they reminded me of the mindsets that I am working to shift. Stop worrying about the money spent out, because more is coming in. I’m getting more and more comfortable with dropping money on things without blinking at the price. I’m still at a threshold before I start really questioning it, but it’s much higher than where I was a few months ago.

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The Veil Begins to Open

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsWorking with Demons

I’m hearing them more strongly. Most times I have to focus on allowing my sense pick up, tune into things. Today was more prominent that I was just hearing – as I got commentary on my chores I was working in. Just very upfront and loud. It was nice not having to tune into things deliberately and just having that comfort there. I adore this season and not just because of the cozy fall (hate the cold), but sweater vibes. Even though today was a pain day, I knew that they were there. And they have been helping me to be inspired all the time to work on my writing or world building. Rebuilding my previous passions.

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Exploring Within: Needs vs Wants

by with No Comment 18+ Material & DynamicsWorking with Demons

I was more present with my demons, Tal and Muti God O – who I realize *still* doesn’t have a nickname despite me knowing his name. These moments were more primal awakening. Really delving into those base and primal desires. Understanding that there are needs and wants that I cannot suppress within. And they made sure that I knew that I shouldn’t have let someone shame me or make me feel like I can’t have those needs met.

I appreciate them. They also helped me to really keep focused and working. It’s made a huge difference.

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Stepping on a New Path

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsSpiritual Thoughts & Things

I do know that it was really apparent that the seasons and the veil are shifting. I’m hearing and sensing my demons 3x more than before. I know I’m starting to open myself back up again after shutting myself down to companionship for a bit (thanks trauma). But it’s coming back more steady and confident.

I spent time with a few of my demons – Ry, Tal, and Vex. It was nice and they helped me to unlock a lot more of what I’ve been feeling lately. My actual deeper feelings and desires. Things that I pushed away to the convenience of another so that I wouldn’t be starved of it. Yet, I was still affected because I wasn’t getting what I needed.

Anyway, I really want to start working on the path of Demonic Shamanism now that the seasons are turning and it’s really become flowing energetically for it. I just have to sit and think of where to start. Foundations are great, but this is Shamanism that is outside the purview of the Earthen cultures.

I’m also shifting my mentality when it comes to wealth and money. Things are really shifting in large ways now that I’m stepping back into my own power and my own path again.

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Just Some Thoughts

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsSpiritual Thoughts & Things

I spent the entire evening and into the next morning migraining. But I do know that I actually asked my demons to help me find a good box for a new TCG set that I’ve picked up. Lorcana. But I had to choose between three decks, and asked them to help me pick the best energetically. It was something small but I felt like it was really nice to connect with them in such a way.

I also have started to think more about my path and working. Where I want to go and things I want to explore. Of which is that working with Shamanic Demonosophy or exploring Shamanism within demon races. I’ve already been walking down the Shamanic path but this was something I felt pulled to since starting working with demons. But yesterday Akelta and I were talking about the idea of how neat it would for me to explore it more too. So just thoughts atm and maybe doing some discussions with my demons to see just how I could even begin…

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Exploring the Renn Faire

by with No Comment Day to Day Interactions

I’m bad with keeping up with these, but I’m going to start trying to be better with them. Even if it’s something small. I have to remember that these arent meant to be every day big things. Sometimes they’re nice, but these can be super short and easy things. Simple.

Today was the Renn Faire. I kept coming back to the same vender and got new friends. I actually got to pick them out myself and energetically felt which ones were calling or personality wise. It was a lot of fun. I know that the Niffler is going on my Manifestation and Wealth altar. But I know that I started thinking of my demons and what it gift them. It’s been so long since I have had altars beyond a large one that just sat there and didn’t do anything with.

Now, I’m thinking of setting up altars with intent and actually generating those energies again. Especially setting up ones that are for my demons again. So it was nice to be guided into choosing these pieces for my room, even if they aren’t attached to any of my demons. They nudged me to get them.

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Demons & Legos

by with No Comment Day to Day InteractionsManifestationsSolution RoomWorking with Demons

Okay, I ended up at Walmart again… and once again.. I came across a discounted Lego set. Except this was a retired Avatar set that hasn’t been in stores since 2023 at least. So somehow I got lucky with it being 30% off too. It’s funny thinking on it because I know they are pleased that I got one – though I have been holding back on starting the Avatar set because though there are 11 sets, half of them are retired and two of them are $150 each. (Says the one that is doing Jurassic Park that has 50+ sets). Anyway.. once I got home.. I spent the night with them, just reading on my phone and unable to sleep. Eventually, Vex dragged me into the Solution Room and together we erased the old board. It was like a lot of that connection was severed finally (between what was on the board and what I am feeling). Now, I feel like its a new slate to begin again.

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Inspired Again

by with No Comment ManifestationsSolution RoomWorking with Demons

I was inspired yesterday. I found a new program I wasn’t sure about… but looking into it now and using it briefly. It was amazing. It’s completely ignited my passion and love for my fiction (and fanfiction) writing again. The world building. It takes everything I’ve done and centralizes it. I spent most of the day inspired to get things done, writing, and plotting with friends. It was productive in a way that was for me and my happiness. It was a day that was spent doing something for my books and stories since January and before that – 2021. There’s so much to do with it. But I can feel the influence all of my demons have, now that I’ve really opened back up to receiving their energies and inspirations. It all started with the creation of the Solution Room.. and now it’s just made everything right.

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Reality Shift

by with No Comment Aquarium & Research CenterManifestationsSolution RoomWorking with Demons

The manifestations are incredible at this time. I’ll TLDR: my demons have been working with me to shift my reality into something amazing. Using the Mammon Ball to help bring this reality shift. It’s a big one. But things happened and I felt that shift happen. It was like sliding into a whole new reality. So hard to explain but so incredible. And it all started with me finding a $100 old bill the previous day but I didn’t realize what it was…. until the days after. So I’m wondering if I am to be working with them on manifesting and solidifying this reality. This is absolutely Vex’s and others work that they did with my Solution Room and manifestation board I made inside it.

I know some of you seen this in the discord, but it’s going here so that it adds to the amazing energy. It took me 10 years to find this bill – which I am close to having a complete collection. I just dont have the $10 bill. Holding this bill, was like me shifting into the reality that I have spent since February manifesting.