It’s interesting in how things circle around. I’ve been working with going back to my roots of my practice. Connecting with my demons. It’s been a rough few years where I was only connecting on the surface. Back when I was fully into my practice, there was so much that I was delving into. Ry wanted me to dive into dark energies of crystals and connecting with plant spirits to receive wisdom. Tal wanted me to create grimoires and journals to write information down. So I went into hand binding to learn how to properly make them. Vex and a few others were so keen on my learning malas to make malas for connection. Belle and Taz of course are my necrosis bone workers so they wanted me to delve deep into Osteomancy and uncover more to it.
But that fell to the side because of so many trauma and issues. I lost the plot somewhere and I was afraid to get back to it. Maybe it’s because I felt shame that I had let it get to me. And then embarrassed to meet them face to face bec I felt that shame. It’s a whole cycle of the mind.
Then, it just all shifted. Those blockages fell away in December and I let go of the shame and embarrassment. It wasn’t easy and I worked with a therapist to help get me back on my feet.
But you know what it’s done? I’m looking at mala beads to start back up making them. I’ve pulled out my palm stones to carry around and connect. This year’s crystal or at least starting is Epidote because demons pushed that one so in face. I’ve started thinking about writing my Osteomancy articles. I’m feeling the flow return.
Blockages are the hardest. Healing is not easy and it’s definitely not linear. But the biggest lesson is that the demons are always there at whatever capacity that I need them. I didn’t need teachers or mentors or those pushing me. I needed companionship and understanding. That’s what they gave me these past years. Now that I am stepping back into my path, they are right here with me.
It’s come full circle of my interests again. Now I’m ready for this New Year to really kick off and dive back to it. Starting with sharing my experiences and things I’m working on.
So now I’m gonna ask you, what is something you’re going back to., reviving, or even starting anew? Something you wanted to attempt? I think I’m going to really begin my astral work again. Revive it and delve deeper.